It is not uncommon for teenagers to lie to their parents. Even if you have a great relationship with your teen, they still might end up being dishonest with you. They might be attempting to get out of some responsibility, avoid disappointing you, or simply test boundaries as part of developing their independence and own identity.
The response parents have is crucial in minimizing future instances of lying and developing a healthy relationship with their teens. Taking drastic measures isn’t the best way to go, as it might damage the relationship and only make the teen tell more lies. Instead, try the following.
Remain Calm
Having an outburst or resorting to grounding right away will do more harm than good. Instead, remain calm and have an open conversation with your teen. Let them tell their side of the story and share how their lying makes you feel.
Don’t Take it Personally
Most parents take lying personally, but you should be aware teens don’t look at it that way. It is more about their self-preservation or ways to demonstrate rebellion while their hormones are running wild.
Consider the Underlying Causes
You should consider all the factors that led to dishonesty and adjust your parenting methods if needed. Most of the time, strict rules or high expectations prevent teens from exploring their interests and put pressure on them, so they try to work their way around them.
Reiterate the Importance of Honesty
Help your teen realize how important honesty is. Tell them that they can count on your help regardless of the issue or problem they encounter, but that the only way you can help them is if there is transparency. Also, remind them of the consequences that lying can cause, like hurting others, getting themselves in a sticky situation, and becoming untrustworthy.